The Fourth Assault: Conker and the HTF Curse
by Darkfanboy19
Summary: Following seven years after Conker became King of all the land, he is still one miserable squirrel. Still depressed about the loss of his girlfriend, Berri, he still continues fighting for the SHC against the evil Tediz. Conker then discovers a way to reclaim his loss with a little help. Rated M for obivous reasons. ON HIATUS.


**The Fourth Assault: Conker and the HTF Curse**

**Opening Scene**

**(Please note that this isn't part of the main storyline, it is most likely a short before the beginning of the story.)**

Inside the Cock and Plucker, everyone inside is having a drink, talking and sometimes throwing up in the toilet. On the poker table we surprisingly find four familiar characters who are playing poker. It is none other than Cuddles, Flippy, Petunia and Disco Bear on the poker table playing cards. The yellow rabbit himself believes to be getting a good hand as he has 3 kings and a ten. Flippy on the other hand is looking nervous and seems to be losing. Petunia looks at her cards with a smile while Disco Bear peeks over the blue skunk's shoulder to either get the moves on her or cheat. She notices this and pulls away from her cards with a glare, much to Disco Bear's pleasure.

While their game goes on, a very familiar character enters the bar. Who is red, with a crown on his head and looking down in sadness. It's Conker! And he walks to the bar stand and sits while he continues to gloat over his loss. "So." Said the bartender. "What's it gonna be, partner?" Conker looks up and just says. "The usual." While still sad. He can't stop thinking about his late girlfriend's death.

Meanwhile back at the card game, Flippy looks at his cards and smiles with an open mouth. "Ahhh." He says and places his cards down revealing two jacks, a nine and a king. He tries to grab the chips but is stopped by Disco Bear who presents him with four queens and an ace. "Oh yeah." The afro bear mutters while grabbing the chips in front of him while Flippy groans in misery.

Back to Conker who is still sad.

"Listen, pal. You can't go on like this." Said the Bartender who is getting the whisky bottle. "Things change, and we can't change them back." He pops open the wine bottle with a loud pop. Loud enough for the sad Flippy to hear it. He turns over as he heard the pop and suddenly his eyes fade in and turn yellow. As you could probably tell already, he has indeed flipped out into a murderous rage.

The Bartender continues talking to Conker as he pours him a drink. "You can't go back to the past, just like that. When you're dead, you're dead. You can't come back."

Just as that was happening, Petunia is looking at her cards and all of a sudden something went past her. "Huh?" She mutters as she looks over her side and sees that a card has been lodged into Disco Bear's head. He suddenly takes notice of it and screams in pain suddenly a barrage of cards fly at Disco Bear slicing him one piece at a time, finally another card decapitates him and his blood has been sprayed onto Petunia's face. She screams in horror and Flippy emerges behind her while with his evil grin and he grabs the screaming Petunia's head and smashes face on the chips over and over, with splattering blood. After he's finished her face is barely gone not until he forces her battered face through an empty wine bottle, finally killing her.

The Bartender continues talking to Conker while the bloodshed happens. "I mean, if you die then you couldn't come back. Won't you. I mean if there was someone special than you. Then they could come back the same way as you do. Even if their death is so brutal."

Meanwhile, Flippy grabs the now scared Cuddles who seems to be babbling "Ah ah! Oh my god, oh my god!" as his speech is like every other Happy Tree Friend is gibberish. Flippy grabs a funnel and violently sticks it down Cuddles' throat. He places like a dozen of poker chips in it and with a deep breath he blows into it and the chips fly through out of Cuddle's butt and they hit all around the bar. Cuddles screaming in pain with the funnel in his mouth blows up like a balloon as Flippy continues blowing through it until he finally explodes into a bloody mesh.

Back to Conker after he just drank the whisky. "Well, thanks the advice. Ugh! I gotta go."

Conker leaves his stool as the Bartender says. "Don't get too over your head, sonny. It could be bad for your health."

"Well I'll try and remember that." Conker says before moving again as Flippy lays eyes on him. He then lunges at him with a battle cry. Conker then stops and goes back to the bar, oblivious of Flippy's sudden attack as he hits beer bottles he flew into rather than Conker. "Sorry I forgot the tip." He reaches his pocket and puts two coins on the stand and then leaves.

Conker then spots a very bruised Flippy who has stars above his head and groaning. "Ah… party pooper…" He says and finally stumbles out.

Flippy regains consciousness and is not flipped-out Flippy no more. He then sees that he broken some beer bottles that the Bartender had up there. "Hey! My drinks!" Yelled the Bartender at Flippy who does not realize this. "You're gonna pay for that you know." He told him as he laughs nervously and sees a bunch of bar-goers looking at him with a glare.

Outside, Conker just stumbles outside of the bar and looks up at the raining sky. "As if. If anyone does die then it can't be possible to come back. I mean their dead, right? So, if they died in the first place, then how could manage to pop back to life. Escaping death's embrace?" Conker asks himself as he stands around he then hears thunder. "Well, I know it can't be too good to be true. I mean I don't believe in fabled legends, but death. Yeh! That too."

"Well, I better get home." He finishes as he wanders off.

Just as the short ends Flippy's decapitated head is thrown outside where Conker was standing. The expression on Flippy's dead face is very horrific. The black hole closer appears as it shrinks on Flippy and suddenly poker chips get thrown next to him with the Bartender yelling "And stay out, you stupid s&%t!" And the black hole closes with that same noise.

A moral appears:

"Play your hand straight even if you lose your first game."

* * *

**And in the next chapter the real story begins. I hope you liked the beginning, coz it gets better than a typical Happy Tree Friends short.**

**Also the &% sign is a censor beep, like in the Conker games.**

**By the way, I will continue my Batman and Powerpuff Girls fanfic sometime over next month.**


End file.
